July 16, 2007

Walking on the sidewalk, hotter than a match head

it's not the heat, it's the humidity, by sharon shapiro

* Top ten conservative idiots. excerpt:

"4. The Bush Administration

"Heh, remember when that lovable prankster George W. Bush said, 'If this were a dictatorship, it'd be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator,' and the press thought it was so cute and funny? Psst... he wasn't joking.

"The Senate is still trying to investigate the U.S. Attorney firings and corruption at the Justice Department, so last week Our Great Leader decided to help out by ordering his former counsel Harriet Miers to ignore a Judiciary Committee subpoena, citing executive privilege. Meanwhile, former Rove aide Sara Taylor assured senators that George W. Bush knew nothing at all about the U.S. Attorney firings but, er, executive privilege prevented her from saying anything else about the conversations he didn't have and wasn't involved in.

"Taylor also told Senators that, 'I took an oath to the president, and I take that oath very seriously,' to which Patrick Leahy replied, 'Did you mean, perhaps, you took an oath to the Constitution?'

"And in a related story, the House committee investigating the death of Pat Tillman has hit a roadblock - you guessed it, the Bush adminstration is refusing to turn over documents, citing executive privilege.

"With his stubborn insistence that 'when the president does it that means it's not illegal' and his Nixon-like approval ratings, one wonders whether George has started talking to the paintings yet."

* The story behind the greatest alcohol icons. excerpt:

"According to company legend, Wild Turkey got its name via this charming tale: In 1940, Austin, Nichols and Co. executive Thomas McCarthy filled a jug of undiluted high-proof bourbon to share with his friends during their annual turkey shoot. His chums liked it so much they insisted he bring more of that 'wild turkey bourbon' to future outings. McCarthy, a N.Y. businessman with a background in marketing, figured there might be a demand beyond his hunt-mates and launched the brand in 1952.

"Nothing enthralls a bourbon drinker more than knowing the aged corn liquor he holds in his hand was conspired by a bewhiskered 19th-century hillbilly, which explains why bourbon distilleries spend so much of their advertising budgets obsessing about their respective histories. Austin, Nichols and Co. (originally a N.Y. based food distributor) likes to hint that they can trace their liquor lineage to 1869, but the fact of the matter is they’re adopting the history of a distiller (Ripy Brothers) they bought out in the mid-20th century.
Why It Worked: The wild turkey is an crafty and, might I say, tasty creature. Benjamin Franklin was so taken by the creature's charms that he wanted it to be our fledgling nation’s national symbol instead of the bald eagle. And since Wild Turkey doesn’t own a deep history that would allow them to put a bewhiskered hillbilly founder on the label, the next best thing is an animal hillbillies might want to shoot.
Dark Secret: It may say Real Kentucky on the label, but Wild Turkey is owned by Frenchmen. The Pernod-Ricard Group bought the distillery in 1980, and they’re not too shy about the fact. Says master distiller Jimmy Russell: 'Wild Turkey is a little family distillery. It’s just that the family lives in Paris.'

Claim to Fame: Was Hunter S. Thompson’s choice of liquor. He rarely traveled without at least one bottle in his bag.

* "Baseball is what we were, football is what we have become." -- Mary McGrory (1918 - 2004)

* In DC? Tonight at Ft. Reno: The Caribbean, with Len Bias and The Ardennes. Free, first band 7:15 pm.


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