March 21, 2005

Don't lean on me man, 'cos you can't afford the ticket

* Top 10 conservative idiots. excerpt:

"1. Congressional Republicans

The story of Terri Schiavo is a sad one. She exists in a vegetative state and is kept alive by a feeding tube. Her parents want her to remain that way, her husband of twenty-one years wants to remove the feeding tube, and the courts have become involved. But last week Republicans on Capitol Hill lost their minds and decided to make a political issue out of Schiavo's case.

First they issued a subpoena which in theory prevented the courts from taking further action in the case, but also raised the possibility of Schiavo being wheeled in front of a committee so that Republicans could use her as a political prop. Senate Majority Leader Dr. Bill 'HIV Can Be Transmitted Via Sweat' Frist took to the Senate floor to dispute the diagnosis that Schiavo is in a persistent vegetative state - based on a video that he had spent 'an hour or so looking a'" - which caused raised eyebrows among medical experts and ethicists. Tom Delay called the case "an act of medical terrorism," demonstrating once again that Republicans will play the terrorism card on just about any issue. John McCain suggested that Terri Schiavo should divorce her husband, despite the fact that Republicans are constantly harping on about the sacred bond of marriage between a man and a woman.

But all this rhetoric is put neatly into perspective by the revelation that Senate Republicans circulated a talking points memo last week explaining why they should try to make political hay out of Terri Schiavo. The memo stated that the 'pro-life base will be excited' and that it is a 'great political issue - this is a tough issue for Democrats.' Excited? Great? Do these ghouls have no shame whatsoever?"
"6. War Profiteers

"Last week the House of Representatives approved yet another $80+ billion request by Our Great Leader to fund the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. That's about $300 billion or so we've spent on these wars since Bush came to power. Impressive. Of course, all the money is going to a good cause, right? I mean, surely its worth cutting child services, education, and health care in this country so that the Iraqi people can elect an Islamic theocracy, thus severely punishing the people who attacked us on 9/11... wait a second, that doesn't sound right.

Anyway, there's no need to worry at all about where this money might be going because helpful corporations such as Halliburton will be taking care of it. Why, just last week it was revealed that Halliburton had bought gasoline from Kuwait for $82,000 and then charged the Pentagon $27 million to transport it into Iraq. In fact, Pentagon auditors reckon the amount of overbilling by Halliburton on fuel imports alone adds up to $108 million dollars.

So as you can see, destroying Iraq was the smart thing to do. Not only do companies with extremely close ties to the Bush administration now get to make vast profits off the backs of the American taxpayer, we also get to cut programs at home for those who need them the most! It's a win-win situation!"

* Tom Waits' 20 favorite records. [via] excerpt:

"2. Solo Monk by Thelonious Monk (Columbia) 1964

Monk said 'There is no wrong note, it has to do with how you resolve it'. He almost sounded like a kid taking piano lessons. I could relate to that when I first started playing the piano, because he was decomposing the music while he was playing it. It was like demystifying the sound, because there is a certain veneer to jazz and to any music, after a while it gets traffic rules, and the music takes a backseat to the rules. It's like aerial photography, telling you that this is how we do it. That happens in folk music too. Try playing with a bluegrass group and introducing new ideas. Forget about it. They look at you like you're a communist. On Solo Monk, he appears to be composing as he plays, extending intervals, voicing chords with impossible clusters of notes. 'I Should Care' kills me, a communion wine with a twist. Stride, church, jump rope, Bartok, melodies scratched into the plaster with a knife. A bold iconoclast. Solo Monk lets you not only see these melodies without clothes, but without skin. This is astronaut music from Bedlam.

3. Trout Mask Replica by Captain Beefheart (Straight) 1969

The roughest diamond in the mine, his musical inventions are made of bone and mud. Enter the strange matrix of his mind and lose yours. This is indispensable for the serious listener. An expedition into the centre of the earth, this is the high jump record that'll never be beat, it's a merlot reduction sauce. He takes da bait. Dante doing the buck and wing at a Skip James suku jump. Drink once and thirst no more."

* How many American POWS died while captured by the insane and lawless North Vietnamese during the entire Vietnam war? 113. From all causes. What killed the 108 (so far) reported in our custody? Mostly 'violent causes.' [via]


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